Understanding Your Temperament: The Phlegmatic

Have you ever been described by people as a calming presence? You might have even been called a great listener, though sometimes you wonder whether letting others take the conversational reigns is really just a way to avoid the limelight.

Caretakers often referred to you as an easy child. Your parents could leave you with a toy for hours on end, and teachers appreciated your quiet obedience. You’ve never had an issue making friends, as you much preferred to play other children’s games, listen to their music, and watch their favourite films.

You have a Phlegmatic temperament.

A steady routine is important to you, and you enjoy completing tasks others find menial or boring. This is because you avoid change at all costs. After all, why would you want to launch yourself into something new and unknown, over what is comfortable and familiar?

People can rely on you to finish any task you set your mind to and are rarely surprised when you once again meet their expectations. As such, you are not a quick person by any means, simply because you want to do things right. This behaviour extends to socialising, whereby you are slow to respond, taking the time to find the perfect retort. This perceived shyness may frustrate your energy-filled Choleric and Sanguine counterparts. Melancholic friends might think you’re unimaginative. You have great ideas, dear Phlegmatic, and it’s time you realised they are just as important as anyone else’s.

Over time, you may come to despise your closest family, friends and co-workers, as you feel stuck in an endless loop of exertion with no rewards. That’s not to say you want a prize for your work. A quiet ‘thank you’ is more than enough.

The problem here, my Phlegmatic, is not being underappreciated by others. You must appreciate yourself. Just as there are gusts of wind and raging seas, there are evergreen trees. They sit still, impervious to the energy around them, providing us with sanctuary from the blistering sun above.

All information written here is from Xandria Williams’ book, Love, Health & Happiness: Understanding Yourself and Your Relationships Through the Four Temperaments. Williams believes the key to harbouring a successful relationship with yourself and the people around you comes from an intimate understanding of their temperament. If you struggle to relate to this particular post, feel free to click on my short summaries of the Choleric, Sanguine or Melancholic personalities instead.