Jonah Hill’s Texts Expose Problematic Use of Therapy Language in Relationships

The recent release of text message screenshots allegedly from Jonah Hill to his ex-partner, Sarah Brady, has shed light on a specific type of toxic behaviour within relationships. In these texts, Hill, who is 39 years old, sets strict “boundaries” for his partner, dictating what she can wear, post on social media, and do in her social life. However, it’s important to understand why these demands are problematic and the concerns they raise.

Sarah Brady, a 26-year-old semi-professional surfer and law student, had been in a relationship with actor Jonah Hill around 2022. Although they never publicly announced their split, reports suggest that they broke up before Hill went public with his current girlfriend, Olivia Millar, in August 2022. It’s worth noting that Hill and Millar have since welcomed their first child in May 2023.

Brady took to social media to share a series of text message screenshots, allegedly from Hill, as a warning to other women about this kind of behaviour. The messages depicted Hill requesting Brady to remove certain images from her social media. Hill objected to her surfing with men, engaging in modelling, and posting pictures of herself in a bathing suit. He also expressed concerns about her friendships with women from her past and their potential instability. These demands were presented as Hill’s “boundaries” for their relationship.

The problem lies in the misuse of therapy language. Boundaries, in a healthy context, refer to personal limits individuals set to protect their well-being and integrity. However, in this case, Hill’s demands go beyond personal boundaries and encroach upon controlling behaviour. This misuse of the concept of boundaries can make it challenging for the recipient of such demands to challenge or question them.

While Hill has not responded to these allegations or confirmed the authenticity of the texts, the incident has sparked discussions about the misuse of therapy language and the potential harm it can cause within relationships. It is crucial to understand that setting boundaries should not involve setting rules for others, as true boundaries are about self-care and personal autonomy.