How This Tinder Translator can Solve all Your Online Dating Cryptic Messages

Online dating is hard enough.

How this Tinder Translator can Solve all your Online Dating Cryptic Messages

They say there’s plenty of fish in the sea, and that might be true – when it comes to the abundance of men posing with them. In fact, your next cameo may as well be in NCIS, considering the amount of times you’ve identified the suspect – a where’s wally fanatic who seems incapable of uploading anything but a group photo. And just when you thought your finger might be permanently incapable of moving left, you’re then expected to analyse a bio that is almost always incredibly confusing.

Until now.

Rejoice (or be discouraged) by the Instagram account @tindertranslators, a woman (and twenty-something-thousand follower base) doing us all a favour.

Here are some of my personal favourites:

I’ve got to admit, being a spiritual person myself, I’m a sucker for these ones. I think this boils down to psychology – if a person considers themselves spiritual, they must have decent values to us. Now, this isn’t the case for every person, but please be wary when you meet someone who asks to align your chakras on the first date.

This one takes me back to a certain guy who may or may not have read me a Nietzsche book on our first date. I love a good psychology book, but this particular one sent me straight to sleep. In fact, I’m not one-hundred percent certain this account isn’t him.

The hypocrisy here is just too much to bear.

And yes, before you say anything, women can be just as bad.

If these translations don’t both discourage and amuse you at the same time, I don’t know what will (besides that one ex of yours).